Our View on Internet Porn
The Titty Version!
Shame on you!
My views on Internet porn!
(For what
they’re worth!)
Well, firstly I’m tempted to scream "can’t
get enough" and leave my views there, but I will elaborate a bit.
It should be said that I would consider myself a fan of
porn, hell which male, 18-35 demographic isn’t?
BUT..............................
I’m
not exactly a consumer in that I have never actually walked out and paid for the stuff,
unless you include a charming lady called Minni Mozola from Maida-vale who maintained a
handstand for over 15 minutes once whilst I changed my roll of film for one with a faster
speed, but that’s another story.
So, I don’t consume by purchase but I do consume by action, I must
have seen thousands of naked ladies on the net and in various magazines that I have found
lying around at 
work, which nobody seems to own, strange that isn’t it?
Having established that I have used the stuff it would follow therefore that I find it acceptable, not quite!
I find pasta acceptable but I don’t want to find the stuff in my mail each morning. I don’t want pasta falling out of my telephone and I don’t want to turn the page of some publication and find pasta where I expected to see a picture of a vintage car. In short I don’t want pasta rammed down my throat, I mean who would, we all saw what happened to that bloke in Seven with Mr. Pitt and Mr. Freeman didn't we.
Similarly when I do want pasta I want to be able to get it on demand, un-censored and the type that I fancy at that specific moment. I don’t want somebody telling me that my pasta is too twirled, long or thick for my own good, I know what I like thank you very much and hell, if the pasta don’t mind, why should you?
I don’t condone the use of un-consenting, under age or farmyard
pasta in any way.
The above used to be the situation with regards to porn on the net, it is no longer the case, porn is everywhere! I find it impossible to enter the most innocent of queries in a search engine without some reference to porn sites being returned. Most recently whilst searching for a device driver for my sound card I was promised the delights of "Brunette Sluts tarred & feathered" not an altogether unattractive proposition I’m sure you’ll agree. Exactly how this relates to the search string "SoundBlaster drivers download" is however beyond me. Don’t even try MP3 ~ you’ll have more pasta on your hands than you can handle.
Imagine
if your telephone operator worked in the same way, "I’m looking for a plumber in
the South please" - "well Sir we have naked cheerleaders on a rope, would you
like me to connect you?" It just doesn’t work does it?
No, the fact is that the sheer volume of porn on the net has ruined the stuff for me. The sight of a pair of perfect breasts was something that I attained to achieve through effort and perhaps a modicum of good fortune, now I must see 10-20 pairs a day, where’s the fun in that?
I detest censorship in all its forms, but it’s getting to the point where I would put an 18 certificate on the whole of the net as there is no way to prevent the young from bumping into the stuff - without even trying. Don’t tell me there is or I’ll shout "Alt Binaries" at you.
Now show us your Fettuccini’s!
So you choose the porn version eh, I'm sure you really wanted to see the pasta version didn't you, OK then it's here, you know you want to and I wont think you are any less of a man, honest!
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This has been a Shagnasty production of value to wheat based products only!
This page last viewed by it's creator : 31/03/2004